Do you want free birth control? Me too!

Birth control has only been legal in the United State since 1965. That means, for the past 46 years women have been able to take the right preventative measures to ensure fun, hot sex without the looming thought of possible pregnancy (always a good thing).

A few days ago, a panel from the Institute of Medicine recommended that "the government require health insurance companies to cover birth control for women as preventive care, without copayments." In the past few months in our horrible political (GOP) climate, it has been incredibly difficult for women to receive proper preventative care. This is a big victory, but we're not there yet. It's now up to the Department of Human and Health Services to act upon the IOM's recommendation.


Please tell HHS you support making birth control available to millions of women without co-pays or other out-of-pocket costs.

Bottom line: birth control is basic health care.

30 Steps to Self Empowerment (SAAM)

If you didn't already know, April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month.

And I know, I know... April is practically already half way over, but I thought I would share these 30 steps to self empowerment, to commemorate Sexual Assault Awareness Month, written by S. Davidson. I found this piece while tabling for the Women's Center in our student union and it comes from the Minnesota Coalition for Battered Women, although, I'm sure it's been published elsewhere, too.

I believe that this list was originally created for women who have been physically or emotionally abused by a parent or partner. In any case, these steps are so motivating and inspiring and may apply to you anyway. I encourage you to share and, in turn, try to live by these steps.

30 Steps to Self Empowerment

1. Follow your gut!!! If something doesn't feel right, it's probably not a good place for you to be. Your instincts rarely let you down, but we've been conditioned, especially as women, to ignore these.
2. Try not to be afraid to ask for help. There's many wonderful people more than willing to help you in a positive and healthy way.
3. ASK what you don't know. Learn to be self sufficient: Read, go to the library, enlighten yourself in any way you can. Learn how to drive, budget money, become organized, save money, be responsible for your bills/children/self.
4. Face your fears... realistically, patiently, safely. Create scenarios in your mind, practice saying your thoughts out loud so "paralysis" won't set in.
5. Set realistic goals for yourself and believe in yourself.
6. Try not to lie to yourself.
7. Surround yourself with positive people, avoid those who will tear you down in any way.
8. Don't feel bad if you stay away from old friends or even family members.
9. Take care of yourself - responsibly. Understand that there's a big difference between self care and being selfish - and think about where those messages of being selfish are coming from.
10. Set clear boundaries. Set limits. Learn/experience how good it feels to say NO.
11. Develop your spirituality but avoid following blindly. Whatever your faith, walk the talk.
12. Treat others the way you want to be treated: with dignity and respect.
13. Know your own limits but don't underestimate your own personal power.
14. RECLAIM!!
15. Put positives in place of negatives.
16. KNOW, deep within your heart that NO one deserves to be abused, you're not alone and i fyou have been abused in any way, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
17. Develop a safety plan: for you, for your children.
18. Be prepared.
19. Be patient: especially with yourself. Healing is a process. It takes time, but it's worth the wait.
20. Put responsibility where it belongs. If someone has hurt you, it's their responsibility. If, after taking an honest and guilt free look at yourself, you feel you have hurt someone... make amends and try not to make the same mistake.
21. Understand the difference between lonely and being alone.
22. Stand up for yourself; as a woman, as a human being.
23. Learn to take a critical look at media images and messages.
24. Challenge the stereotypes that may keep you oppressed in any way.
25. Learn to be assertive; not aggressive or passive.
26. Learn to hope again. Take charge of your life.
27. Be responsible. Freedom comes with being responsible.
28. Find your hidden talents - your creative side - develop it.
29. Learn to make decisions. Understand that life is about choices. With every choice we make, there's a consequence. Try to make the choices with the most positive consequences.
30. Take deep breaths. When you're stressed, you forget to breathe. Trust you instincts, trust your gut, trust yourself. YOU are important and worthy of being treated with respect and dignity.

Wonderful Women of March: My Mother, Alison

My mother. Yup. Isn't she cute?

This woman is the most influential woman in my life; thus, why I'm making her my first Wonderful Woman of March. Not only is she my mother, but she's also my close friend and confidant. Sweet and corny, right? I know.

In high school, my mother and I were usually on good terms, but we weren't as close as we are now. Which, some might say is typical because of college; basically, I've matured.

Anyway, these are the reasons why my mother, Alison, is my first Wonderful Woman of March:

1. On the topic of body image, my mother never, ever pushed cultural/societal beauty norms or standards in my face. Ever. She was, and still is, always so supportive about how I look, according to her, I'm never too fat, too gross, too anything. I, specifically, remember a time in middle school when I was trying on clothes before the first day of school and I told her I looked fat, and she told me that I wasn't fat, I was beautiful. I'm always beautiful to my mother, and as she is to me. I can't express how lucky I am to have a mother who doesn't pester me about my weight, diets, and excessive exercising.
2. My mother is educated. She studied law at the University of North Dakota and graduated with her Juris Doctor. Aside from her law degree, she is a brilliant woman all around.
3. My mother is passionate. My mother told me that she really didn't have a desire to be a laywer when she was working her way through school; all she really wanted to do was be a mom. She had four children with my father and she was the mom she always wanted to be. She's passionate about being a mother and seeing that her children do well in life, supporting us in the best way she knows, and letting us figure things out for ourselves, as we grow older. 
4. My mother is compassionate. She has a very big, loving heart. She's one of the biggest animal lovers I know, and enjoys taking care of all of the animals on the "small hobby farm" she lives on. She bottle-fed and raised three domesticated white-tail deer, and likes watching them enjoy the life she's created for them out at our family farm. 
5. My mother and father are a unit. They're so in love with each other, it sometimes makes me sick, but I also know how rare it is to have a mom and dad that are still married and living together, that still want to spend time with each other, and rarely fight. My parents have been through some hard times in recent years, and yet they still stay strong and committed to each other and everything eventually works itself out. 

I have so many more reasons than just the ones listed above, but I wouldn't want to keep you reading forever. My mother is wonderful, and I'm so lucky to have her in my life.

I also know that if my dad were to read this, he'd be all, "What about meeee?"

And to that, I'd say, "Dad - you're pretty rockin', too."

Free Support Network for Birth Control

About Bedsider:

"Babies are great…when you’re ready for them. We think in the meantime women should have the right to a healthy, happy sex life without having to worry about unplanned pregnancy. For that to happen, women need to take an active role in their own reproductive health. We want to help with that.


Bedsider.org (Bedsider) is a free support network for birth control operated by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. Launched in beta form in 2010, our goal is to help women find the method of birth control that’s right for them and learn how to use it consistently and effectively.


Right now, about half of all pregnancies in the United States are unplanned. That sounds like a lot to us. We hope that Bedsider will be a useful tool for women to learn about their birth control options, better manage their birth control, and in the process avoid getting pregnant until they’re ready."

Bedsider offers many different resources when it comes to birth control and the different methods that can be used. Each available method the website talks about has the details about the specific method you chose to use, possible costs, how to use it, side effects, and any problems (effectiveness) that you may face when using a certain type of birth control.

Also, Bedsider has videos from real women about their personal stories regarding birth control. My favorite part, by far, is the fact that at Bedsider, you have the ability to set up text messaging/email reminders for health center appointments and a reminders to take your birth control pill according to the method you use. Neat, huh?

Be sure to check it out and take advantage of all it has to offer.

Spoiler Alert: "Hall Pass," and why it's a terrible movie

So, this is literally another spoiler alert. If you had planned on seeing the movie "Hall Pass," then don't read this - well, unless you want to. Ha.

Just a few minutes ago, I got home from the theater and I'm mad. If you haven't yet heard of this movie, or seen any TV commercials about it, here's the trailer:

Aside from the obvious humor, this movie, in my opinion, had an underlying message: marriage isn't anything to be taken seriously. Women's hopes and dreams are getting married and having children. They live out their dreams all the time. Ohhh, but men on the other hand, they don't get to live out their dreams. They don't get to "bone" any woman they want, whenever they want... because that's the ultimate man's dream, isn't it? Most poor men never get to live out that dream though, do they? They're overbearing, "neurotic" wives wouldn't ever allow that, right? Wrong.

Then "Hall Pass" was made. Every man's dream is to have a week hall pass in life, right? To have the right; the privilege to do whatever they want for one week... whatever they want. Imagine what that would do to a marriage?

According to the movie, a supposed "hall pass" could save a marriage. This movie made marriage seem like a chore. Men eventually lose interest in their wives, resent having children, and can't "control" their "manly" urges to look at other women while with their wives. Sex is a chore to the women and they'd rather pretend they were sleeping that actually have sex with their husbands.

This movie made me mad.

I understand that this movie was making fun and playing off of every stereotype that was ever created about marriage, and I also understand that there are situations, such as those shown in the movie, but there's a much larger issue here.

These men in the movie weren't satisfied with the women they had. No. They wanted young, sexy, easy women. Of course. I lost count of the shots of women's asses, breasts, stomachs, legs, etc. There was actually a point during the movie that I was taking notes. Yeah, I'm the kind of person that takes notes during a movie, but that aside, men are being told that this type of behavior is all right, and acceptable!

The husbands in that movie were seen as incompetent, irresponsible, and child-like. The first thing I thought of was Sarah Haskins and the skit she did titled, "Doofy Husbands." Sarah basically goes on to explain that the media portrays married men as "husbands that can't do stuff.... he was so cool and then he got married, and now he's slightly dumber than a dog."

These men in the movie, "Hall Pass," reminisce about their pre-married lives;  how much fun they had before they were tied down, all the chicks they slept with, and how hot and manly their bodies were. According to this movie, marriage ruins not only relationships, but can really "demasculinize" a man. Oh, dear.

The entire movie was riddled with stereotypes that made it so predictable. The ending was as expected - the wives took the husbands back after their "hall passes," and everything was fine. Everyone was happy and all that jazz... typical. Just to add, as well, one of the wives had sex with a complete stranger, as well as her husband sleeping with a women he barely knew. And the only reason I'm saying that is because I would hate for anyone to read this and think I'm sexist or leaving any part of the movie out. Believe me, I've taken every part of that movie into consideration when writing this post, and yes, you're right - most of this was written entirely out of anger.

Usually I would be mad at feminism for "ruining" this movie for me. Sometimes I wish that I could just be dumb and not understand social stereotypes, gender roles, or feminism in general. Just for one night. I mean, can you blame me?

I realize that I shouldn't be so upset over such a silly movie, but stuff like this needs to be talked about. So, if you're an avid feminist, I highly suggest not going to see this movie, or better yet, if you wish to add to my critique, please, I insist that you go see it.